The Monty Python Code

For those who happened to stumble upon this article per search engine, this particular post is part of an article series Let’s Write A Novel. My intention is to challenge those authors who write about writing a novel. About 99% of these books are filled with inspirational blubbering. Their strongest feature is a strong, but misleading title. The rest is pure fraud.

In our little project we are going with mainstream taste, and we are going with Dan Brown. The title of our work will be The Monty Python Code. Any resemblance to The Da Vinci Code is, of course, purely coincidental.

To follow our writing project go to Let’s Write A Novel – The Monty Python Code.

Outlining the Story

The simple reason that many aspiring authors never make it beyond the first few chapters lies usually in a lack of organization. Let’s face it, writing a 60,000+ words work is a major project, and it should be handled as such. A rough outlining of the story does not only help to keep organized; it also gives you an overview of the work ahead of you. For instance, writing the outlining might tell you that the structure of your novel calls for 20 chapters. In this case you know that you need an average of 3,000 words per chapter.

Note: There is a multitude of programs available in the marketplace helping you to organize your writing. I tried a few of them, and they are indeed very helpful. Nevertheless, while they do help with organizing your writing project, most of them provide less-than-standard word processing capabilities. I personally prefer working with Microsoft Word, especially due to the automatic spell and style checker. In addition, I use Microsoft Excel to keep track of my research references – See my post Let’s Write A Novel – Researching the Topic.

Step #1 – The Synopsis

Try to summarize your novel in less than 200 words. Of course, 200 words is not enough to describe the story line, but think of it as a movie ad on TV. You don’t need to reveal the details of your novel; that is not the purpose of a synopsis. If you want to attract the attention of an agent or publisher, you need to act like a sales person.

In the case of our writing project The Monty Python Code I have come up with the following:

Professor Hubert Ringtone, America’s top specialist on religous sects, becomes an unwilling conspirator in a plot to reveal the deepest secrets of the Thetan Society, the fastest growing religious movement in the history of the world. Four of his students have been tortured and murdered after discovering the health records of the Thetan Society’s founder, Ron Bruiser. These records could prove devastating for the movement’s message of abstinence, or might even destroy its very foundation. Ringtone, with the help of another student, Margaret Hatcher, engages in a roller-coaster quest to find the location of the secret documents, followed closely by his nemesis, Don ‘Potatoe’ Quayle, the grandmaster of the Knights of the Thetan Society, the movement’s military side-arm.

I am sure there is still some room for improvement for this particular synopsis, but for now we’ll leave it as is – you get the idea.

Above synopsis already includes another step in our writing project, the character development. The synopsis includes four people, Professor Ringtone (apparently the main character), Ron Bruiser, Margaret Hatcher, and Don ‘Potatoe’ Quayle. We will come to the character development in a different chapter of the project, but let me make an important point: There is no forced chronological order in which you need to accomplish the steps of the writing project. You can start with writing the story, and while you write you encounter new characters, or you realize you need to add, remove, or move chapters. And even while you write the outlining you might discover characters you haven’t thought about before. Outlining is a dynamic process. It helps you to keep a focus on the story line, but it will most definitely change while you write.

Step #2 – The Outlining

As I wrote before, an outlining goes hand-in-hand with the character development. So, while you write the outlining, keep records of the characters you create and try to describe them. The first draft of the outlining will most probably result in only a few chapters, but over time you will add more, and you will rearrange them. As a result, do not number your chapters, but give them a brief description.

Okay… We now approach my second-most favorite work – writing the outlining. The most favorite work is the actual writing. The outline, though, is the first step into an adventure. Honestly, in the case of The Monty Python Code I don’t have a glimmer of a story line, but that only adds to the excitement. I will write it while I go with this post.

The Monty Python Code

Chapter – Igor Feldman kills student Hillary Pinton
Scene in a basement. Hillary is tied to a chair, blind-folded. Igor uses 20-inch knife to pierce her heart.

Chapter – Professor Ringtone arrested for murder
Ringtone, in front of his students, explains the history of the Thetan Society. Police shows up and arrests him.

Chapter – Ron Bruiser having sex in hotel room
Flashback – two years earlier. Scene: A hotel room in Monte Carlo with view to the Mediterranean Sea. Ron Bruiser, very drunk, has sex with supermodel Holly Darton, also very drunk. Hidden cameras film the scene.

Chapter – Interrogation
Professor Ringtone interrogated by FBI Special Agent Jethro Tibbs. Turns out, Hillary Pinton’s murder took place in Ringtone’s basement. Ringtone can prove he was at the university at the time of the murder, but Tibbs suspects Ringtone hired somebody to do the kill. Ringtone is released due to lack of evidence.

Chapter – Quayle’s Outrage
Scene: A meeting room at the Thetan Society’s headquarter in Salem, Massachusetts. Don Quayle is outraged. Ron Bruiser just told him he is being blackmailed. Bruiser orders Quayle to find and kill the blackmailer. Everything points to Professor Ringtone.

Chapter – Meeting at Ringtone’s house
Scene: Ringtone’s house around midnight. Margaret Hatcher, one of Ringtones students, is at the door and demands to talk to Ringtone. Confesses that she and four other students – who are now all dead – tried to blackmail Ron Bruiser.

Chapter – Igor at the house
Igor Feldmann watches Ringtone and Hatcher through a window. Good opportunity to write about his childhood – of course, he was abused – and his fantasies. Also mention “the master” who promised Igor the fulfillment of all his fantasies.

Chapter – Ron Bruiser orders another killing
Another flashback – one year earlier. Bruiser is on the phone in his office, ordering the killing of supermodel Holly Darton. She attempted to blackmail him, asking for $894,000 as a fund to further her acting career. Refer to the electronic bugs in his phone, and the person, two blocks away, overhearing the conversation.

Chapter – Ringtone meets Quayle
Late afternoon at the university. Ringtone wants to enter his car, but two dangerous looking guys with walk-in-closet-size chests push him into a large pink limousine. Inside he meets Don Quayle. Ringtone convinces Quayle he is not responsible for the blackmailing, but admits he has some vital information. Makes a deal to spare Margaret Hatcher’s life in exchange of the documents implicating Ron Bruiser. Quayle gives him 10 days to produce the evidence.

Chapter – Quayle background
Scene: Quayle inside the limousine on the way back to headquarters. Good opportunity to explain Quayle’s background and the military side-arm of the Thetan Society.

Skipping a few chapters – may add more later…

Final Chapter – The End
Ringtone and his new-found love, Hannah von Tana – a German exchange student, stand next to Margaret Hatcher’s dead body, kissing.

In the next post I will write a few words about character development, but the most exciting part is filling the chapters with real words. Stay tuned…